Fugitive Forgiveness

Across a thousand miles of pain,
Across an ocean of burning tears
I can feel your deep regret,
An unuttered plea for my forgiveness.

It’s not that I can no longer forgive,
It’s not that I want you punished -
It’s simply that I cannot forget
The betrayal, the torment and the anguish.

I walk to the sea; I can hear from here
Your silent voice across the cobalt sky,
Stretching above the chirpy waters,
Their happiness in contrast to my harrowed cry.

I long to forgive you. I want to pretend
That our encounter has never happened.
I want to say: ‘Hey, I don’t regret
That my life and yours have collided.’

I wish it could be so very easy
To erase the memories that burn
Through the mind -taunting and needy,
Having reached the point of no return.

The memories - unyielding and time-frozen,
The voice from the past refusing to leave,
The promises made only to be broken,
The anger that will not allow to grieve.

All of these shall conspire together
To make it impossible to untie
A tormented heart tightly tethered
To the resentment’s never-ending supply.
 

Copyright: Nara Hodge 2018

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